Hi my friends. It's release day! My new song (and silly home video) for "Everything But Loving You" just came into the world, and I wanted to write about it a little since I'm mostly off social media and not doing a traditional promotional blitz where I beg a bunch of media folks to write about it. Instead, I just want to put it out there, give some context to the song, and then not stress out about whether or not people listen to it, but trust that It will find who it needs to find. So, basically shooting my music career in the foot, haha. Small price to pay for mental wellness during a pandemic.
Even though it's a love song, I wrote this tune from a pretty scary place. Anxiety dug its claws into me hard a few times this year. While I've lived with that little shithead in my brain for pretty much my whole life, this time, it felt harder to manage. Chalk it up to infertility, a rampant pandemic, ongoing social injustice, national incompetence, you name it. It's a traumatizing time to be alive, even for the most mentally stable people.
In those moments, I didn't have or use the correct tools, and the result was an overwhelming sense of hopelessness and helplessness, which veered pretty hard into a land of shame and self-hatred where I started to lose sight of my worth on this planet and value of living life in general.
In those moments, my anxiety puts me on trial, unfairly and incessantly asking me, "If you can't fix everything, what's the point of you?"
In those moments, the one thing that is stronger than anxiety's prosecution is love's defense. I was able to hang on by focusing on the sense of purpose I feel in loving and being loved by my wife. Writing this song about Audrie, the person that makes me feel calm and sane and steady, provided enough of a glimmer of hope that I needed to be a functioning human again.
Speaking of being a functioning human, this is the first release that I produced, with the help of friends James Staton (bass), Steve Nichols (guitar), Jules Stewart (drums) and Amelia Sarkisian (mixing). It's not perfect or polished, but what feels more important to me than being perfect is: making an effort within my capacity, being proud of any small progress in that effort, being compassionate about any setback in that effort, and letting go of any attachment to other people's perceptions of that effort. It's a good way to fight anxiety. It's also a good way to approach art. And life.
In closing, I feel it's important to disclaim as a white person that this song was written in a mental health moment about a mental health moment. In no way do I want to give folks musical permission to ignore injustice in your community and in the world. I must admit, I've worried the song could be perceived in that light. But then, I just gotta circle back to letting go of any attachment to other people's perceptions of my effort. For me "quitting everything" kinda means letting go of the shit that doesn't serve me (sorrow, anger, worry), and focusing on the shit that does (love, love, love, etc.) so I can function with more clarity and serve others with more stability. However, I absolutely would like to quit doing the dishes for the rest of time. ;)
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Lyrics (for word nerds like me)
Hey y'all - wanter to share a little interview I recently did with Shoutout Socal. Thanks to my buddy Cathryn Beeks for referring me to their team! Read the interview here.
Thank you to Danielle Tucker for inviting me to come on her Pandemic-Proof Singer Series livestream show on Facebook. I'm always inspired by folks who are finding ways to keep creative communities together during pandemic times, and Danielle is a great example of that. In this episode, I talk about songwriting, Lady Brain Collective, We All We Got SD, and more. Catch the replay below and don't forget to follow Danielle's vocal coaching page to watch even more episodes from so many talented singers.
Video Description: Thumbnail is a press photo of Lindsay White, photo credit Sydney Prather. Video is a split screen zoom session, on the left is Danielle Tucker (wearing denim top seated in front of a mirror, plant, and beige and white tapestry), on the right is Lindsay White (wearing black top, seated in front of a colorful mountain tapestry that has hats hanging on top of it).
This month, Lady Brain Presents is interviewing some LGBTQ+ members about their experiences and perspectives being a part of the queer+ community. To read the full series, click here - my interview is this one.
Hey friends! It's been a hot minute since I had a piece of press to share with you, and this one is exciting because my wifey got to join in on the fun. Thanks to Sydney Prather for photographing us and inviting us to be a part of this Pride series! Read more here.
Thanks to the team at She Fest for inviting me to represent Lady Brain Presents on their virtual panel of artists. It was a treat to share space with womxn creatives who are striving to keep communities together during this time. She Fest did such a wonderful job with their day-long festival - nothing but respect for their organization and leadership! Watch the panel below, around the 44:00 mark!
Thanks to my buddy Jonathan Frahm for the recent feature in For Folk's Sake. Click here to read the full interview!
Thank you so much to the San Diego Music Award academy for nominating "The Funeral" in the Best Pop Album category. I'm super surprised that a single made it into that category (I always vie for the Best Songwriter category), but beggars can't be choosers, and I'm just happy to be included in the conversation. The festivities take place on Monday, March 23 at House of Blues, but please consider joining us first at The Merrow on Tuesday, March 17 for a SDMA Nominee Showcase where my full band will be sharing the bill with two other nominated acts Kimmi Bitter and Evan Diamond.
Thanks to the Rye Room Sessions in Portland, OR for having us back last summer. Here's the second tune from that session, called "Some Man, Some God, Some War." (Featuring the awesome Jules Stewart on drums!)
Along with my raging feminism, this song was inspired by a book called The Sandcastle Girls by Chris Bohjalian, which gives a fictional account of the Armenian genocide. Sadly, the themes still resonate in our modern society. I'm looking forward to the day when we actually learn from our mistakes, but until then, at least there's music to process.
Thanks to Vents Magazine for covering my new single "The Funeral" on their site! Read the full article here.